Why you have to say goodbye so many times and why it’s okay
There was a time when I thought the way you made me feel was healthy. You convinced me my purpose in life would fade to nothing if I didn’t have you. The worst part? I believed you. You found me at my lowest so you could lift me up and put me on top of the world. You shoved me into the churning waves so you could command the sea to part around my body and save me like the hero you are. You plunged me into darkness so you could be my light. Nothing. I was nothing without you and you moved heaven and earth every single day to prove it.
Then I met people who showed me what it was like to feel like something more, over and over again until it finally sank in. I no longer feared to fade to nothing when you left. Because I already was everything on my own. And more. And you were nothing to me.
So, to the person reading this… I hope you find someone who never stops choosing you. Someone who can’t stop looking at you, can’t stop marveling at the way your eyes light up when you talk, wandering in the way you smile. Someone who will make you breakfast on Sunday mornings. Someone who will wake you up with kisses, and cinnamon rolls. But please don’t waste your time waiting. Know that love will come to you in the most unexpected ways, at the most unexpected times. Before you know it, it will rush into your life at full speed. Until then, please realize your worth and learn that no relationship can determine your value. You are here and you are you and you matter.
Because that’s life, people come and go, the sun sets and rises, you fall down and you get back up. Why would you want to keep someone close who does nothing to be kept, who struggles to escape from the hands you closed around their arm? Maybe they want to go. Maybe they need to. It’s all about meeting new people and saying goodbye to them, isn’t it? It’s letting them catch a glimpse of what’s beneath your armor. And if you’re lucky, they’ll teach you a lesson or two, you become a story they’ll tell one day and they’ll become one of yours. Because in the end it all comes down to us moving on, to us changing and growing – to us becoming better people. To us getting to know ourselves, learning who we are and learning to accept and love ourselves as much as possible. Maybe we need a heartbreak or two to realize that we’re better than this, maybe we need to cry for hours on end, waste tears on someone who does not deserve a single one to see how much better we can do without that person.