No More

I don’t think you have even the slightest idea

How much I hurt

How difficult it is to move on from the past

Because the pain, the pain you caused persists

No matter how many times I try and pick myself up

The countless times I tried to disguise tears with laughter

And the endless declarations never to think of you again, never to care

Are all for nothing because something always brings me back to you.

I hate so many things about you

Yet, I compare everyone, anyone to you

And no one, not a single one, comes close.

I’m angry at myself for doing that

I’m angry at myself for still having these feelings for you

After all that’s happened, after all you’ve done

I still miss you, love you

I will have to learn to forgive us

That time will come soon enough

Things may be uncertain right now

But this I am sure of – – –

It is because of the hate and love you’ve made me feel

That I don’t ever want you back.

***

Follow me at: http://doreenmariaclara.wordpress.com