The Importance of Being Alone

The Importance of being alone By Andrea

At five years of age, I was dressing up as a bride while my sister walked me down an imaginary aisle. At ten years old I was pretending to be Barbie while I reenacted her wedding with Ken. At fifteen years old I was making Pinterest boards with specific floral and table arrangements for my future wedding. Now, at twenty three years old, I am working in a fine jewelry store spending most days dreaming up designs for my future engagement ring. Why is it that our entire lives are centered around falling in love and getting married? With all this energy spent making room in our hearts for someone else, how often do we remember to leave room for ourselves?


Ever hear the saying, “You can’t love someone else until you learn to love yourself?” It’s cheesy and sounds like total bull sh*t, but it’s the truth. Too many young adults rush into relationships, dating countless people for short periods of time and going back to their exes time and time again. Maybe it’s a generational thing, maybe it’s Tinder. Maybe it’s the fact that we are so connected all the time through texting, calling, and social media, we don’t know how to be alone. In the waiting room at doctor’s offices, on the train ride to work, and walking down the street most people are buried nose deep in the little translucent screen in the palm of their hands because they need something to distract them from the fact that they can actually hear their thoughts. Now that’s scary. When did we get so caught up in other people’s lives? When did we start spending more time reading their thoughts than we do listening to our own?

We often underestimate the importance of alone time. Not only does it allow us to work through problems and emotions, it gives us confidence. When the word “alone” was first created it didn’t mean “lonely,” it meant “complete.” Being alone is magical. I dare you to spend a day by yourself shopping, wandering the city, taking pictures, and eating an entire pizza without a care in the world what anyone else thinks just because you can. And I promise, when you turn off the light at the end of the day and sink into your bed, you will feel a sense of wholeness. A sense of security in knowing that you can be on your own, and you can be happy and confident.

You don’t need a man to take care of you or to define your self worth. When you are truly comfortable in your own skin, when you love yourself with all your heart, not just half of it, you won’t be desperate to meet the next guy and you won’t be worried about being single. You’ll be happy where you are, just the way you are.

And I am by no means saying that dating is bad, or getting back together with your ex is bad. People change and dates are fun. Not only that, but dates are important. I believe they help shape who we are by allowing us to discover ourselves in other people. I believe in love. I might even believe in love at first sight. I believe in being so sure the person you are with is the person you were destined to be with. But I also believe the most important relationship you have is the one you have with yourself.

So be alone. Cherish being alone. Invest in a relationship with yourself first, and love will follow.

The Importance of being Alone

By Andrea

Somewhere Soulful

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  1. Good read. A friendly reminder to most millenials who invest so much on other people yet overlook improving their own selves.

  2. A good read. I love spending time to myself because I’m able to look at the other side of life, and it helps me understand where other people are coming from. It taught me how to understand myself and those who are around me.

  3. Sometimes I prefer to be alone. It’s the best time to think from everything.

  4. Great Article. 🙂 <3

    “The key of course, is to learn to trip on ourselves without becoming an addict." – Biella Noble

  5. Yep. We should have a healthy relationship with ourselves first before committing to another. Being alone is indeed magical.

  6. I agree that we should fall in love with ourselves first before we take the opportunity to commit to others because it’s the best way to effectively avoid on being pained so much.

  7. Being alone does not necessarily mean you’re sad or lonely. Sometimes, it’s better to have time for yourself and that’s how you’ll realize the true essence of life.

  8. Yalung, Andrea – MAR142
    1. Implicit / Non-Material
    2. Knowledge
    3. The key is yours

  9. Apigo, Maria Maise Ann (Mar142)
    1. Implicit
    2. Knowledge
    3. “KEY FOR YOU”. wherein it depends for everyone if they wanted to be alone. loneliness will serves as a key for them to realize the true importance of life and time.

  10. Madel P. Olveda (MAR142)
    Sociology MQ2
    Ethnocentrism- believing that it’ll be better to spend your day alone in that way you’ll feel complete and rather than depending on others try to enjoy a day by yourself.

  11. Labayne, Abigail D. (MAR 142)
    Sociology MQ2
    Ethnocentrism- states that it is important to be alone than being with others

  12. Rosario, Aeroll Andrei N. – ARC 133 – HARTAPP – MQ2 (Contre-jour)

  13. Rosario, Aeroll Andrei – ARC 133 – HARTAPP – MQ2 (Moment)

  14. Castillo, Jan Ericson S.
    Sociology MQ2

    The article above falls under individualism. The last sentence tells why: “So be alone. Cherish being alone. Invest in a relationship with yourself first, and love will follow.”

  15. DE VERA, Raymund Anthony R.
    Sociology MQ2
    Ethnocentrism – Because sometimes it is better to be alone and getting to know more yourself.

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