When Death Knocks Closer To Home

Published by Harping by a Pixie on

We are all familiar with death…we know what death means…and yet, we look at it as something that does not belong in this realm – foreign, therefore should be treated at arm’s length. When we hear of stories about this kind of loss from our friends, we are always quick to offer words of consolation to them. They are in heaven…free of pain and suffering…there is no reason for the grief. Perhaps that is true…I do believe that it is true. Nevertheless, when death comes knocking a bit closer to home, we still find that we are not ready to deal with the loss. We cannot meet it with grace or glee.

My aunt just passed away…complication from diabetes. She had been in and out of the hospital for quite a long time so, let us say, it was an eventuality that anyone should have seen coming. Yet, the day she finally went away, I felt sadness in losing her just the same. I have no regret nor misgiving. After all, I treated her well like a mom…I tried to be there in a way I know best and I can do best. Still, I felt sad that I sought quiet and solitude for a short while…just to console the sorrow in my heart.

Death takes something from us that we can not gain back, no matter how we cry our eyeballs out. What makes it difficult, I think, is the fact that we cannot get away from memories playing in our head. What those people have done for us…the love and care we received from them…the moments we shared with them. Back then, those things seem trivial and ordinary – nothing but the usual outcome of living and interacting with people in our lives. However, once gone, without any chance of return, those little, mundane things suddenly matter…abruptly occupy space in our soul.

She was fond of me…proud even, with what insignificant life I made. She was always there to back me up when people talk behind my back or in my presence. She understood me a lot and accepted me as I am. She was quite that kind of aunt – although she was not a blood aunt because she was my paternal uncle’s wife. Despite that, she treated me and my siblings and several of my cousins like her very own.

My uncle, like many in his family, is a very conservative man…in short, strict. He is my dad’s youngest sibling but many of us looked up to him more like an older brother than an uncle. My cousins, siblings and I are mighty afraid of him because he would discipline us a bit harsher than our real fathers. Woe if you ever get caught cutting classes or talking with guys!

His wife, my aunt who passed away, was the balancing act. She would happily distract her husband to let us steal beer from their grocery store (heck, do not raise your brow, you were once a kid too). She would allow us to order cocktail drinks when we eat out which, all the while, my uncle thought were nothing but fancy juices. She would be excited like a teenage girl when we talk of lovelife or guys. And the best thing of all, she would always keep us happy and gay by ensuring that our tummies are full. She could cook quite well…way better than our moms. As I grow older and more independent, she had been there both during good and bad times.

Whenever I visit my folks, I always make sure I find time to pay her a visit as well because she would feel bad if I was in town and did not show up. I talked to her many things which I normally do not discuss with my own mother…shenanigans or otherwise.

Too many memories to tell…too many to remember. It is no surprise then that she left a hole in our hearts when she finally died.

On the night before she passed away, I prayed to God for relief so that she could go home and out of the hospital. I do not know if that Great Being misunderstood what I was asking because, instead, she died the next day. Still, I cannot find it in me to blame God or to bear hard feelings. Maybe it was for the best. She already suffered a lot after all.

I only wish that she is with the Divine… enveloped within that radiant love-bliss of the eternal…I wish she is “home”…finally.

When I saw her corpse, it was like looking at a stranger. To me, it was just a shell there inside the coffin…devoid of the love and warmth that I identify with her. I can no longer connect with her lifeless vessel and letting go of that body was a lot easier. Still, there was one brief moment I was not able to take hold of my emotion…maybe it was the music playing, maybe it was the silent crying of others, maybe a glimpse of some memory in my mind that drove my tears to fall. Except that the whispering and chattering of some people (wondering whose relatives we are) beside me jolted me back to reality that I was in public. Why cannot people be at least sensitive for few minutes and remain silent as respect to grieving hearts? No one would want attention at times like that. Peace and quiet would have been perfect gift.

Yet, it is difficult to make them understand I guess…for until it happens to you, death is just an alien thing.

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Harping by a Pixie

An entrepreneur by day, dreamer by sundown. A curious, irreverent and mischievous soul who loves books and places which would explain why writing and travel are my passion.

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Marry Joy
Member

It only means that all of us or all the living things in the world needs to deal with this situation in life, were in we should left our love one’s and face the reality of life in other dimension. Even though it will live heartaches, but also a courage to help them learn to deal in the rule of life and a stepping stone to start again without being afraid of the death. Were are still not sure if we will go in the paradise after our death, the only thing we can do while we are still alive… Read more »

J.r.
Member

the only thing in life that’s constant is death. the only thing that’s different is when it will strike or who it will strike, but i do know.. that we will all experience death.. i can somewhat relate to this article due to the fact that i lost my father not too long ago.. because of this i have learned that we can never tell how long we will remain in this earth.. may it be years,months,days or in just a couple minutes.. we have that possibility of death.

John Rey Dungca
Member
John Rey Dungca

We will all die we just need to accept how and when it will happen.

Crizzalyn Cruz
Member

Death comes when we least expect it and when happiness is just in the corner. It’s so sad that when a person you really love; you’re fond to died. You’ll never know when or where. It will just happen—like a light that’s already decided to turn off. In this article, I’ve realized that we always need to cherish the moment. Because as soon as the time passes by, you’ll never notice that it will become a memory.

Kiana Rara
Member
Kiana Rara

Death is unpredictable. It may hard to think that our life will be taken to us. Since we may not know when will the time come, let’s live our life to the fullest. Do things that we won’t regret in the end. Lastly, acceptance is the key, know how to let things go and accept the reality.

Casey Alcober
Member

Before, Ive always believed that all of my loved ones will die peacefully. No suffering brought by this universe. My uncle was held up and was shot last Sept. 2017, and it shocked the whole out of me. For months, my family and I, forgot how to live, and thats when I accepted that death is inevitable. That it cannot be escaped.

ACT-183

Carmella Jane O. Caligan
Member

We accept the fate of ours that in every beginning there shall be an end. If there is life, there is death. Accept it or not, the life we have is just borrowed from above. It must be hard but soon we realize that atleast we make it worth living. So live your life to the fullest because we’ll never know when our tine stop ticking.

Jesica Dagsaan
Member
Jesica Dagsaan

We must appreciate things that are still here because one day it may be gone. It is fulfilling that we give joy to someone and made them feel at least once that they were special. We must be ready for an end because if death comes, at least we will leave them with memories that they can keep.

Dana Aliganga
Member

Death is inevitable and it is for everyone.

Act 183

Kate Angela Mae Longasa
Member

Death it is something we will face at one point in our lives or another. It is either a death of a loved one, friend, or yourself . It is inevitable, and I’m scared to it, I’m scared to death – the fear I might lose one of my parents. It’s something that I did not choose to face, or even want to anytime soon. Some says death is peaceful, life is harder. Death is peaceful as well as very painful. And life? Life always slap our ass off with reality but it will be always happy to love and… Read more »

Mary Ann Luces
Member
Mary Ann Luces

Death is a natural part of life. We should understand and accept that we all have our endings and there is no exception. God is fair to us never blame Him, just enjoy and appreciate every moment of our life even the little things. It is hard to accept the reality, but with God they were living in peace.

Patricia Estacio
Member
Patricia Estacio

I just can’t imagine losing someone whether it is a family member or a friend, can’t imagine and never will imagine but comprehending a thing that cannot be eloped is so hard to accept. We always say “yolo” so we should live our life to maximum of everything. Let them hear what you want to say and let them feel what you want them to feel because we never know when will be the ending.

Danica Aireen M. Camunggol
Member

People say, everything happens for a reason. That everything happened and the things that are about to happen are all based on a written plan God has prepared for us and we do not have any control over nor choice but to deal with it. For some, the spontaneity of this events may result in a positive way in a sense that the changes took place is in favor of them but for most people this may be viewed negatively in contrast to what they expected things would turn out to be. But this also may vary across individuals depending… Read more »

Mharian Mabahin
Member
Mharian Mabahin

We do never know when death is going to bump into our life. If it’s yout time, it’s your time. You can’t change it. The challenge here is not how to avoid death but how to face it. The only suggestion I can give is that, we should treasure our lives and live to the fullest not because of “YOLO”, but because we are proving to Him that we’re worth to go to His kingdom.

ACT 183

Denise Aubrey Gallardo
Member

To many of us death brings a chill down our spine ridden with fear, but to others it is ridden with strength and satisfaction of accomplishment. Fortunately or unfortunately we are all condemned to death. However no one knows when exactly the inevitable will approach, but we all know it is inescapable. There’s also the question about when this inevitable event will occur. Could I possibly die tomorrow? In a week? Or do I still have many years ahead of me? The uncertainty of it is truly nerve racking. I think this is where the fear of death can be… Read more »

justlive
Member

Personally I am grateful for non of my close relatives died but when that time come that one of them die the only thing I will regret is I didn’t fully share to them my God JESUS.

Jhozelle Tandaguen
Member
Jhozelle Tandaguen

Just accept what is destined to you.

Patricia Calma
Member

Death takes something from us that we cannot gain back. Yes, death is really painful. When someone that is truly close to you even if you cry the whole day you cannot make her/him come back. But despite of this you should look at the bright side of it. No more pain, sufferings, and God will guide him/her.

Lei Obra
Member

There are people who are afraid of death and there are people who are not but this thing is inevitable. Having someone to go far from us is far more okay than losing someone to death. Ths saddest thing is not saying goodbye to someone who suddenly passed away.

Louwie Jay Tago
Member
Louwie Jay Tago

Yesterday me and my friends were talking about death. And I’ve always said that I’m not scared of dying because I know and we know that it is part of our lives. But the thing that scares me is the people that I’ll be leaving, I do not know what reactions will they show nor their emotions from my “death”. I hope if that time comes, I hope they will accept it. And as of now, I still and will cherish the time that I have in this world. Do things that I want to do before I regret it.… Read more »

Erica Lola
Member
Erica Lola

Death is most people afraid of. But for me I’m more than afraid to lose my family and friend because they are the people complete my soul. I couldn’t even think that one of them will leave eternally. I would rather choose to die than losing them. For me I just want to fulfill my dreams and that’s it, because I’m a kind of a person that is not afraid to die because for me it is part of the reality so we must deal with it when it comes to us.

Jenny Sylvia Eustaquio
Member
Jenny Sylvia Eustaquio

Death is inevitable. And honestly it scares me a lot. The wound of the passing of my uncle is still fresh and it is not easily to deal with. With his passing it gave me thoughts or scenarios that deals with the death of the people I love. I am afraid of even the thought of losing them especially my parents. I can’t imagine myself mourning for them. That is why as much as I can do I will treasure the moments I have with them. Because I don’t want to live with regrets. Regretting that I didn’t give them… Read more »

Kevin Aldrin De Guzman
Member
Kevin Aldrin De Guzman

Death is certain and we can’t do anything about it but to move on and focus on what’s important. Live the life that we should’ve lived. Just keep breathing and breathing and breathing and breathing.

Lea Jane Pedarse
Member
Lea Jane Pedarse

All of us may know that death is part of life however, we still cannot make ourselves prepared enough when one of our loved ones already meets the saddest end of their journey. The thing is, we are used to seeing them and being with them that is why we feel so much pain when they’re gone for good.

ACT183

Mary Erica G. Gregorio
Member
Mary Erica G. Gregorio

Mary Erica Gregorio | ACT184 Death is something thag we can’t control. It isbhard to lost a love ones but we need to accept the fact that they are gone but the memories will remain and never fades.

Kobe Christian Ventura
Member
Kobe Christian Ventura

Death is inevitable and we cannot escape it. Thats why I believe in the saying Carpe Diem or seize the day because we don’t know when will we die.

Christian Versola
Member
Christian Versola

ACT 183

For me, I am also afraid on talking about death. I don’t know, maybe I am not prepared or maybe sometimes I thought in my mind that it is hard to leave someone espescially your love ones. I am afraid to think that someday there will be the time that our love ones will leave us and there is nothing we can do about it. That’s why making memories with them is very important for me to avoid regrets.

em em
Member

Marilou Mae Amparo
ACT183

Death is the most unexpected thing that may happen anytime or anywhere. No one knows exept God when we are going to die. That’s why lets luve our life to the fullest, lets show our live and care to the people we live . Because we never know when and where death will be arrived.

Claire Cadorna
Member

Death is inevitable. Whether we acknowledge it or not, most of us fear death. Death remains a great mystery. But sometimes, we should accept when death shall come to us. We cannot predict our when we’ll gonna die, but acceptance is only the key.

Claire Cadorna
Member

We can’t predict the time of our death. Each of us has a different path and fate. We only need to accept and face it.

Erika Yvette Lopez
Member
Erika Yvette Lopez

The only thing that never changes in this world is that we all have our final destination and that is death. That’s the reality, and we just have to accept it.

Jolinah O. Manalo
Member

Death is inevitable. All people in this world will surely vanish one day. We cannot avoid death, if it is out time, it is our time. It’s hard to be left by someone you love but one thing’s for sure, we should live our lives to the fullest.

Luigi Cruz
Member

We will all die if our time was come and even if we have the means for medication. We can’t stop death.
Luigi V. Cruz
Act 184

Macnell Joseph Panlaqui
Member
Macnell Joseph Panlaqui

We should enjoy every single moment of our lives because we won’t know when will our last day comes and we should accept that when it comes.

Clarisse Salipot
Member
Clarisse Salipot

we will all die not now but in our time. we just have to embrace the life that our God has given.

Justin James Siazon
Member
Justin James Siazon

For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ our Lord. (Romans 7:23)

Princess Leah Banoy
Member

It is really hard to accept the fact that we are all going to die, considering that we dont know when, where and how it will happen, and there are important people we love that will be left behind. The memories, the feelings, and the moments are the things that we uniquely have and only yourself can remember for these are intangible and were only marked in your mind and heart. These are also the things that we can hold onto whenever someone special depart this life. We or the author is just lucky enough that she have the memories… Read more »

Andrea Fernandez
Member
Andrea Fernandez

The saddest part of the death of your loved ones is not the death itself but the reality that you can’t be with that person you loved anymore, no matter how hard you’ll try, and all your memories with that person will stay alive in your heart and mind and these are either make you sad, happy, or give you regrets.

Dana Caluza
Member
Dana Caluza

All of us have an ending and that is death. We cannot escape it because that’s our fate. We have different journey but we have the same destination. But what matters the most is how you live your life. Do your responsibility but of course enjoy your life to the fullest.

April Moselina
Member
April Moselina

Death never come to knock off our feet but a treacherous one. It is something that give us the saddest part when someone that’s close to us will suddenly leave. But still, life must go on. Life is short, we just need to spend the rest of our life being happy and contented.

Jonathan Arcayna
Member

They say that you only live once but the truth is you only die once but you live everyday. A lot of people fear death, and so am I, the reason is that you won’t be able to be with your love ones. I think a lot of us fear death because of the thought that we will be leaving those most precious to us.
Even though that is the case their memories will still be cherish.
ACT182

Joyce Andres
Member

Death is unpredictable and constant. Last month my Lolo died and i felt pain and sadness because I am very close to my lolo. The death of our love one’s can make us feel the love we have for them. Is it true that death is sad but because of my teacher i realized that not all death are sad because death is the way that we would be able to see God and to feel happy without feeling any pain or sick. We should be happy and accept the reality and the death. Yes I am afraid of death… Read more »

Rhia Sapa
Member
Rhia Sapa

Death is something that we know is coming, but we’re never prepared for how it feels. We need to enjoy life while we have it, be good to every person that we meet, so that when the time comes that we need to say goodbye, we wont have any regrets.

Regienald Obiña
Member

It only means that death comes in unexpected way. In the mere fact we don’t know when our time in this world will runs out. That’s why we need to be ready to accept death and be brave whenever the time runs out

Glaiza Gangan
Member

Death is the one and only truth of our life. And one who is able to understand this truth can live their life at its best, because then we don’t have anything to loose. So live your life fully and make life worthy.

Peachy Galera
Member

Galera, Peachy C. ACT 182 All of us will die and that is the essence of life, that is the essence why we lived in this world. All we have to do is to live our lives in the fullest. Do whatever makes you happy. Do whatever it takes. Losing someone might be hurtful, but always put into your mind that God has a reason for it. Maybe He is inviting us in His paradise. We all know that loosing a loved one is the worst thing anyone can handle. But we have to accept the fact that no one… Read more »

Nicks Canivel
Member

Death is about to happen we just never know when it will occur.

Moiseslyn Masagca
Member
Moiseslyn Masagca

Death is the one great certainty in life. Some of us will die in ways out of our control, and most of us will be unaware of the moment of death itself. It is the permanent end of an individual life. We need to accept that all of us will died so that we need to value our life that the God given to us. Protect and care it for us to be able to survive and pursue what we want to have in the future.

Jeybie Mae David
Member

We don’t know when death is coming , its unpredictable, its either today, next day or next month we just need to enjoy our life and share the love that God gave us. And make our life more beautiful so that people can remember you when you pass away or when death comes.

ACT182

ashley nhicollete dela rosa
Member

Ashley Nhicollete G. Dela Rosa
ACT184
Everyone dies eventually, whether they have power or not. That’s why you need to think about what you’ll accomplish while you’re alive.