the ugly writers

Why are we depressed?

It was like a roller coaster swirling around through the speed of light. With the constant blurring sounds plus the never-ending drama anthologies of your existence. It was the moment, you want to take the knife and slash it into…

Why are we depressed? is an essay written and shared by Karla Gravador as an entry for the theme All Filipino this January, only here at The Ugly Writers.

 

depressed

 

Why are we depressed?

 

“My mind and heart were not as one”.

“I am constantly in a battle with myself”

“Why these things keep happening to me?

“Do I have the strength to go forward?”

“ God help me!”

Sounds familiar? I’ve been there before, and I knew how you felt. It was like a roller coaster swirling around through the speed of light. With the constant blurring sounds plus the never-ending drama anthologies of your existence. It was the moment, you want to take the knife and slash it into yourself, feel the weakening beat of your heart, and draw the last breath of your soul.

I’ve done,  and, you have done everything we could from falling apart but it wasn’t enough. You go through your life as if nothing happened but deep inside there’s a turmoil going on, like you want to explode like a volcano. We talked to our friends, we talked to our parents, and we hanged out and did the unnerving routines of our life. From Mondays to Fridays, till Saturday to Sunday, nothing ever changes.

But why do we still feel pain? Why we can’t forget it? Why can’t we be happy? Why we can’t let go? Did you know what’s missing?

Well, it took me one single second to know what’s missing. Literally, I’m sick mentally, physically and emotionally. I took the pain in my hands, and forgot all reasoning.  As I hold the knife, I sliced it through my wrist. I was waiting for the moment, comically, the knife was blunt. Stupid of me! You may laugh outright but after that I wailed like a child. It hit me tremendously what I was missing. I needed God; this was the only thing that I had forgotten to do. To ask God, to save me from despair and grief. I said to him “Please save me ”, and miraculously, when I surrendered myself to him, my life altered its course, the path according to his plan.

At that very moment, things for me have gone for the better. I never feel pain as I did before. I never worry anymore so much that I can’t sleep at night. I never have to be afraid.

You see, we worked vigorously to fulfill the needs and void the social gaps. We celebrated each other’s success and the success of our family. And yet we forgot the very one responsibility that we should be doing: Praising God with all the wonderful things he had done for us. We deprived ourselves with our spiritual needs but we focused on keeping our mental, physical and emotional necessities.

It shouldn’t be that way, since these four aspects are intertwined with each other. If we neglect one single thing from the rest of them, you and I would collapse like the Tower of Babel.

Trust me! I’ve been there and I understand you.

There will be no SOCIAL MEDIA can save you.

There will be no LIKES or HEARTS can warm you.

There will be no ADVICE or SUGGESTION can keep you sane.

It’s only GOD can take away the pain, It’s only GOD who can save you from despair. It’s only GOD who can shoulder your burdens like no else can.

As the scripture says in 1 Corinthians 10:13

“ No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.”

Rather than use the SOCIAL MEDIA to shout your woes, why not cast it to GOD?

Rather than depend on the LIKES or HEARTS of others, why not cast your heart to him?

Rather than depend on your FAMILY ( in which I’m not saying is wrong), why not cast your grief to God first?

There’s no space, no shout-outs, no posts, no testimonials can ever fill the greatness He can provide. Why not trust him, and test him yourself?

And I tell you, you will still feel sadness in your life but you will never feel alone with God by your side. Go on my friend, connect with him directly. You don’t need anyone to direct your line with him. EVERYONE of us has a direct line to him, it was just us who didn’t FOLLOW or PING him a message.

 

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Nina Karla Gravador

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