How can I find peace and happiness?

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“How can I find peace and happiness?”

Dear Mona,

Have you considered the problem in the question itself? If we believe we have to “find” something, that means we have to “look” for whatever it is, and that in turn means or implies we don’t have it.

If you were to have peace and happiness, where would it be? I’d say, shift your view from searching, to recognising. Imagine what it might be like, imagine how it would be *inside* you, as that is the only place it can really be. Right?

And then, the more you practice this recognition of peace and happiness within you, the more that mindset and perspective becomes a habit, and before you know, you’ll have that peace and happiness as part of your life. “Finding” in this case is all about Deliberate Emphasis.

A key understanding is to realise that our Circumstances and our peace and happiness are actually not necessarily directly connected. In other words, we can be at peace and happy in sucky circumstances. But, if we believe and assume our peace and happiness comes from without, then we will have a hard time connecting to those positive states-of-being. What we are, how we are, is largely independent of what goes on outside us, if we so choose. Only we can decide what we really are. And this is the path to peace and happiness.

Your broad question reminds me of the Oracle at Delphi, in ancient Greece of Old Earth. The system worked because those that ran the temple there let it be known that the Oracle’s answer depended on how specific the question is. A clever psychological insight. The more focused our questions, the closer we get to resolution.


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Syl SabastianKim Santiago Recent comment authors
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Kim Santiago

So true. Finding peace and happiness is not about searching. Its about recognizing what you have. Happiness is about being contented on what you already have.