To the person I used to know: An Open Letter

If ever you were here, for a start, I want to tell you that I'm grateful for everything, though I didn't give much attention to say thanks to you as much as I wanted to, still, thank you.

I have plethora of things to say to you, but I couldn’t. I guess I never had the chance and that I didn’t have the guts too. Hoping it’s not too late, but if there will be a chance, I’ll definitely grab it. But since there would be none, let me count the times that I would have done.

If ever you were here, for a start, I want to tell you that I’m grateful for everything, though I didn’t give much attention to say thanks to you as much as I wanted to, still, thank you. Thank you for giving us the chance to meet; a chance to say our first hello’s; a chance for our friendship to bloom; a chance to grow maturely; a chance to learn our weaknesses, our flaws, our hardships; a chance to display our differences; a chance to make up for the mistakes we did, and most especially, a chance to share the love we thought would grow further.

Another thing is if only you were here, I want to say how deeply sorry I was for all the things that made you unhappy when you were with me. I may have been too selfish, insensitive and unaware that you were hurting. I somehow ignored your feelings that made you hide your sadness and pain. I guess, I can’t make you happy and no matter what I do, you will never be happy with me. I always fall short of your expectations. I became too stubborn to listen and to admit that there were times I was the one who was at fault. I was too confident about myself too and have forgotten that I have been neglecting your feelings already. I’m so sorry for struggling to please me and for adjusting your ways just to avoid having arguments with me.

Now that we’re both moving on, I hope in time, you’ll be able to forgive me. I know I can’t ask for it this very moment but I’m still hoping that in time you will. I’m very, very sorry. I now know that I’m not worthy of your time and love. You deserve better and now that you have found your happiness, all I can do is to wish both of you well. I wish you happiness and love you deserve.

And if our paths will cross again, I hope we can smile at each other with no more pretensions and regrets. A smile that tells us we have outgrown our shortcomings and pain. A smile that says thank you for sharing your world to me and became a part of my whole being, ‘coz in that experience, we learned and we’ve become a changed individuals-full of hope, full of trust and full of love.

Ms. Taciturn

Ms. Taciturn

I am decisively indecisive. A paradox. A woman.

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